Are you flubbing the Basics?

2015-02-24

Some guys are confident in their performance. Others know they have a lot to learn. The truth is there are a lot of unsatisfied women out there, as a recent Reddit threat has shown. Are you flubbing the basics in bed? The truth is that the female anatomy isn’t the easiest to figure out. Each woman is different too in what she likes and how she likes to be touched. Still, there are some basic elements that if you master, your bedroom proficiency numbers will go through the roof. First, don’t skim over the foreplay. It takes a while to warm a woman up for sex. If you really want her to enjoy it and come back for more, foreplay is the key. Try kissing her all over, undressing her slowly, and giving one another oral pleasure before penetrating her. Second, communication is key during sex. Lots of guys are the strong silent type. But she’ll feel like she isn’t pleasuring you if she isn’t getting any feedback at all. Let her know how nice it feels. Be natural. But don’t give her the silent treatment either. Let her know how much she pleases you. It will make her feel warm, sexy and enthusiastic, all good qualities to bring into the bedroom.

One thing about guys is they are very goal oriented. That’s why they concentrate on giving her the big-O. But for her it isn’t only about climax. It’s about the experience as much as the orgasm. Of course she wants to be satisfied. But rushing to the conclusion isn’t going to be sexy. It’s going to feel like a race. Instead of building a fun, arousing atmosphere you’ll be putting undue pressure on her and yourself, putting a damper on the whole thing. Instead, be patient. Live in the moment. Use your senses. Vividly enjoy the softness of her skin, the smell of her hair, that look in her eyes when she’s really turned on, the warmth of her body and other sensual happenings as things proceed. If you relish the experience she will too. You’ll both have a better time and orgasm will be far more easily achieved by both of you. If you are going down on her, make it an experience. You want to start off small and slowly build her desire and anticipation. Slowly work your way down. Get up close and personal. Tell her how beautiful it looks down there and how much you love to do this for her. Then take your time. Feel it out. See what she likes, using different techniques and stick with what she really likes once you find out what that is. Don’t be shy. Too many guys are too far away. Dive right in and you’ll notice the difference for both of you.