Tips For Overcoming Performance Anxiety
2014-10-09
In movies the leading man always carries his lady off to the bedroom, and often our mind does the rest. But what goes on is thought to be absolute heaven, where there is never any problem, misstep, worry or care. The truth is both men and women suffer from performance anxiety. It is very common amongst men who feel a lot of pressure to perform in the bedroom, and who wrap their entire masculinity into their prowess. A lot of guys suffer from performance anxiety. It’s actually quite common. If you fear not being able to satisfy your partner, and it’s killing your sex life, here are some tips for overcoming it. First, talk to your partner about your problem. Most men close up, avoid sex and shut their partner out. But this is the worst thing you can do. If you share your problem with your partner, it will bring you two closer together. Your partner will encourage you and it will take the edge off the entire situation. Bring them in and try to work the problem out together. What could be causing you this anxiety? Can you two brainstorm ways to overcome it?
Next, consider whether the cause is medical or psychological. Go see a doctor to rule out any physical causes. Your physician may also have some advice on overcoming this issue, or can refer you to resources for doing so. Try to change your mindset in the bedroom. Go slowly. Focus on foreplay and how good it feels. Make a solemn vow that you won’t judge each other, but will instead focus on your love for one another, your enjoyment, what feels good and pleasure. Now it’s time to think about other ways to please one another besides penile penetration. Oral or digital stimulation, role play, fantasy, the use of toys and erotica—such as erotic literature or films, can all be important parts of the experience, and can place less pressure on you. If you have been in this rut for some time, take a break from sex. Two or three weeks may make you return with a new outlook and a revving engine. If the problem continues, seek out a mental health professional such as a psychologist or sex therapist. The problem may be deep seeded and require talk therapy. Some men have found hypnosis helpful as well.