Doctors’ assumptions on sex heighten lesbians’ cervical cancer risk: study

2015-02-12

(Reuters) – Lesbians may be at higher risk of cervical cancer because they get fewer screenings than heterosexual women, due partly to doctors’ sometimes incorrect assumptions about their sexual history, University of Washington researchers said on Tuesday.

Although nearly all cases of cervical cancer are attributable to a human papillomavirus, or HPV, infection, healthcare providers often do not encourage lesbian patients to get regular HPV screenings, the researchers found.

That is because the disease is most commonly transmitted during heterosexual sex and doctors may wrongly assume lesbians have only had sex with other women, despite studies that have found most lesbians and their partners have had sex with men, researchers said.

A lack of testing can also occur at times because lesbians lack insurance or do not always have a need for pregnancy prevention checkups, or may not want to share their sexual orientation with doctors, the researchers said.

“If we are serious about reducing the rates of cervical cancer in lesbians, an unbiased health assessment by a provider must ask the question: ‘Do you have sex with men, women or both?'” University of Washington School of Nursing professor Joachim Voss said in a statement.

Voss and Lindsay Waterman, an adult nurse practitioner at the Seattle-based university, analyzed medical literature and studies, including Pap screen rates, between 2000 and 2013, published in last month’s Nurse Practitioner journal.

“Ob-gyns should provide the same comprehensive gynecologic health care to lesbians and bisexual women as they do to heterosexual women, including Pap tests,” the American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists has said.

Researchers were unable to quantify the overall rates of cervical cancer among lesbians compared with heterosexual women because cancer patients are not typically asked their sexual orientation, Voss said.

Screening every three years can detect abnormal cervical cells and pre-cancerous lesions in women ages 21 to 65, but lesbians are screened at rates 5 percent to 18 percent lower than heterosexual women because of the perceived lack of risk exposure, the researchers said.

HPV can be transmitted between women partners through both skin-to-skin contact and contact with sex toys.

Nearly eight of every 100,000 U.S. women are diagnosed with cervical cancer annually, the researchers said.

(Reporting by Eric M. Johnson in Seattle; Editing by Cynthia Johnston and Peter Cooney)

How Your Relationship With Food Affects Your Sex Life

It goes way beyond eating aphrodisiacs.

 BY ANNIE DALY

Of course you know that there are certain aphrodisiacs that can help heat things up in bed. And then there are other foods that don’t exactly make you feel sexy (we’re looking at you, three pieces of cheesy pizza before bed). But what you may not know is that your sultry vibes don’t just stem fromwhat you eat—it stems from how you think about what you’re eating, too. We asked Alexandra Jamieson, author of the new book Women, Food, and Desire: Embrace Your Cravings, Make Peace With Food, and Reclaim Your Body, to explain how your relationship with food—not just the food itself—impacts your sex drive. And it turns out, there’s a way bigger connection than you may think.

Let’s start with this basic fact: How you think about food and how you think about sex are inextricably linked—and that’s because they both have to do with pleasure. And guess what? The pleasure link begins, not surprisingly, in your formative teenage years: “When girls are in their early teens, they start picking up on cultural cues that say they should be dieting, even though they already associate food with pleasure since they’ve been eating for their whole lives,” says Jamieson. “At the same time, young women alsostart becoming aware of the body’s ability for pleasure—but there can be a lot of shame around experiencing that physical pleasure for the first time.” So what happens is that the mixed messages around pleasure and shame become linked from an early age.

Sadly, you don’t “grow out of” the mixed messages as you age. The problem still stands with many women—and it’s rooted in the fact that they stillhave a love/hate relationship with food. “I work with a lot of women who are fighting a constant war with their bodies and with their cravings and have been since their teens,” says Jamieson. “They deprive themselves of calories as a way to feel good about themselves or because they think they should.”  But going back to the pleasure thing, deprivation keeps your body in a constant state of discomfort because you want to feel the pleasure but aren’t letting yourself. And when you feel discomfort with your body, you feel it everywhere, all the time—including in the bedroom. “If you don’t feel that your body deserves pleasure, then you’ll develop a disconnect with it in all areas—and you won’t be able to feel pleasure in the bedroom,” she says.

So what can you do to get over the pleasure disconnect so that you can start enjoying food and sex more?  Hint: This is not a free ride to give into all of your cravings and stuff yourself with cake to improve your sex life. There’s a healthier way to do it, and it’s a lot more nuanced. First, stop rushing your meals, and start savoring your food a lot more. “Smell it, feel it against your lips, inhale the aroma,” says Jamieson. “Slow down, and enjoy it. When your senses are fully present, you’ll feel more pleasure, and, thus, you’ll be sending a signal to your body that it deserves to feel good.” (Learn more about how to eat mindfully.)

Next up: Give in to your cravings with a friend, not alone. “Make a moment of it,” says Jamieson. “Many women give into their cravings in a guilty way, behind closed doors. They want chocolate but think it’s bad, so they just stuff it in their mouths to get it over with. You’re more likely to enjoy it if you’re with someone you love, and when you enjoy it more, you’re less likely to think that cravings are bad.” Then let the great sex commence!

Absurd and Awfully Funny Sex Advice to Steer Clear of

2015-02-03

The internet is a great resource for learning about everything, including human sexuality. That said, there is a lot of absurd and yet awfully funny sex advice to steer clear of and not just from women’s magazines. There are what are thought to be reputable resources that are male oriented and just as ridiculous. For instance, according to Maxim U.K., “Pop your chap in a jar of Nutella, then present it to your lady. Be rewarded with a very enthusiastic blowjob.” Certainly if you get any in the external urethral orifice, or the hole in the head of your penis, you’re going to be screaming in pain, not pleasure. The look on her face when you enter the bedroom in such a manner will be photo worthy, that’s for sure. This next one comes from Men’s Health, “After your workout, reinforce her rising T with a sweaty make-out session: male saliva has 10 to 15 times more testosterone than the female’s does… So prolonged French kissing may give a woman enough of a boost in testosterone to stimulate her interest chemically.” This fact about male saliva is true. But no woman on earth wants a sweaty make-out session. The first thing she’s thinking is “Get in the shower stinky man.” If you force it, the aversion and “ew” factor is enough to ensure you are settling down with a tub of lotion and some tissues for the evening.

Here’s another gem from Men’s Health, first get your hands on a string of her pearls, then “lightly lubricate the pearls and your penis. Have your partner wrap the pearls around the shaft and slowly stroke up and down with a gentle rotation.” What woman in her right mind is going to feel okay with you doing this to her good pearls? Furthermore, she’s probably going to be more worried about cleaning them then clearing your snorkel. Next, from Cheateau Heartiste, “Flirt with other women in front of her. Do not dissuade other women from flirting with you. Women will never admit this but jealousy excites them. The thought of you turning on another woman will arouse her sexually.” This is a good way to get yourself slapped, or have her walk out on you. It is woefully disrespectful to flirt with other women in front of her. Sure, some casual polite niceties are okay. And being attractive to others of the same sex is a turn on. But if she sees you flirting with other girls in front of her you’ll be stuck in the doghouse rather than in the penthouse with her.  From Men’s Health, “Make sure she knows how beautiful she is and how sexually skilled she is, especially if she isn’t — sexually skilled, that is.” Do not reinforce bad technique in bed. Be honest with her. If what she’s doing isn’t pleasing you gingerly steer her to what is. Or else you’ll be feeling frustrated and that will turn up in the bedroom. Whatever sex advice you are reading on the internet, remember to be skeptical, have a laugh if warranted and shag responsibly.

The Sauna Lowers your Sperm Count

Sometimes, nothing feels better than sitting in a hot sauna. It’s a great way to relax and unwind, gives one a sense of wellbeing and helps clear toxins, pathogens and impurities from the body. Some cultures naturally take to the sauna, particularly the Scandinavians such as the Swedes, Norwegians and Fins. In some places, it’s even a social affair. But if you like the sauna and you and your partner are trying to conceive, you may want to hold off. A new Finnish study finds that frequent sauna visits lower your sperm count, but only temporarily. Participants in their 30’s went to the sauna two times a week over three months, at 15-minute intervals apiece. Not only did these visits lower the men’s sperm counts, they remained low for three months afterward.Sperm returned to normal levels six months on. The reason the testicles descend from the body is that sperm is produced at a lower temperature. Those men who have undescended testicles naturally encounter fertility problems, as the testes are not kept at the proper temperature.

During visits to the sauna the men’s scrotal temperature increased by 5.4 degrees Fahrenheit (3 degrees Celsius). There is a difference between sperm count and overall fertility. Though this study proved that sauna visits lower sperm count, whether or not it affects overall male fertility is still at issue, experts say. Due to this, sauna visits are not a viable form of birth control. Heat exposure forces DNA to be packed into sperm cells differently. The mitochondria, which powers the cell is also affected. Therefore, men who are concerned about fertility should cease using the sauna, hot tub or taking hot baths. Sitting with a hot laptop in one’s lap for an extended period may also affect fertility, a previous study has found. Still, some experts believe that there isn’t enough evidence in this study to advise men without fertility problems to cease going. Only 10 men with fertility issues were utilized for this study. More research is needed, experts say.

STIs that can infect your Face

Syphilis, once nearly wiped out has made a comeback. In fact, one study found that between 2005 and 2013 infection rates grew 50%. 90% of those who contract the disease are men. But what’s more embarrassing than catching a sexually transmitted infection (STI)? Getting it on your face for the world to see. Syphilis is one such disease. Open sores on the mouth or lips may be a sign of infection. This generally develops after oral sex where one comes into contact with an open lesion, known as a chancre. With syphilis, sores generally arise three to six weeks after the incident took place in the genital area. For the face, they appear within four and ten weeks’ time. A lesion appears, what looks like an open sore. They can be large and may appear inside the mouth or on the tongue as well as on the mouth or lip region.  Some people develop bumps around the mouth or even a rash at different places on their body. A minority even experience alopecia or abnormal hair loss. Luckily, syphilis can be cured easily with an antibiotic.

Chlamydia is another bacterial infection. But here instead of on the skin or around the mouth, it resides in the eye. Such an infection looks very much like pinkeye. If left untreated, it can actually cause blindness. This occurs when the eye comes into contact with an infected bodily secretion. Chlamydia of the eye can also be treated with a prescription antibiotic. There is one STI that shows up on the face that cannot, herpes. This is a viral infection. There are two kinds, HSV-1 and HSV-2. The first is the type that develops as a regular cold sore in winter. The other is a sexually transmitted disease. Herpes is spread through the transfer of bodily fluids including kissing, oral sex and intercourse. You do not have to be the one performing the act. If someone has a cold sore and performs oral sex on you, you can also get it.  Even when you wear protection, if you come into contact with someone who has an open sore you have a chance of contracting herpes. 80-90% of those infected fail to show symptoms, however. It is most contagious when the infected person has a breakout, usually a rash of open sores. There is currently no cure, though there are medications to keep it under control and soothe symptoms. To avoid such an issue be careful, use common sense and wear protection. If experiencing any symptoms, be sure to see your physician right away.

Convince your Girl to Shave down There

2015-01-30

There’s something really erotic about a girl who shaves down there. You notice a lot of strippers and porn stars do it. Sexologists dealing with couples who are having trouble in the bedroom suggest certain games, one of which is shaving one another. There is definitely something sensual and sexy about shaving a woman. If you’ve never done it, you must. If men find it so alluring, why don’t more “normal” women do it? Perhaps it has something to do with the perception of a shaved private area. Women who do so must be thought of as highly sexualized. The good girl stereotype then that many women try and live up to doesn’t allow for this practice. Still lots of guys are into the shaved look and feel. So how do you convince your girl to shave down there? There are a few methods. The first one, come right out and tell her. Don’t blurt it out. Wait for the proper time and the proper mood. Build into it. You want to talk about fantasies over wine before or after dinner, just the two of you. Play some music. Tell her you’re curious to hear more about her fantasies. Pick out one that you want to fulfill for her. Then she’ll ask you about yours. This is your chance to tell her about it. Tell her that you want to shave her sensuously, if you do. Give her some sensual language, about how good it will feel and how much it will turn you on.

If the straightforward but working her into it approach isn’t to your liking, but she’s relatively easygoing or likes some spontaneity, during a bout of foreplay produce some shaving cream and a razor, and make a theatrical event out of it. She’ll either be insulted or throw you out of the bedroom, or so turned on she can’t wait for you to be with her. Most of the time, it’s one or the other. Evaluate how she is when you’ve sprung other types of things on her, if you have, or if she has a wild streak. Do you guys watch porn together? If so, find movies that have shaving scenes in them. Ask her what she thought about it sometime afterwards. If she was into it, you are good to go. Another way to introduce the subject is to talk about some friends you know who introduced it into their foreplay. You could say your friend explained this really hot scene and it made you want to try it. This way she thinks that it was just a talk with a friend, and not that you’ve been harboring an opinion about her downstairs place. Get her to shave your area as foreplay. Lastly, make sure you keep yourself neat in your pubic area before you talk to her about shaving. You don’t want to be labelled hypocritical. The other thing is to make sure she knows how much you love her body. If you get her to think that you think it isn’t attractive, she won’t feel attractive. It will bring her overall sexual confidence down, ergo less sex. Let her know you think her privates are perfect bliss, you just want to try something new.

Dirty Talk Advanced

Men with lots of experience in the bedroom know that dirty talk can make or break the moment. What you say to her can drive her to the edge of ecstasy or to the edge of the bed to hightail it out of there. Most guys know the basics of what to say to a woman to turn her on. But women are complicated. There are a lot of nuances. If you’d like to sharpen your linguistic seduction skills then you’ve come to the right place. Here is dirty talk advanced level. Now when it’s at the beginning of a relationship, or it’s the first time after a tremendous fight or even after you’ve broken up and gotten back together, whatever the situation when you tell her “We can take it slow” mean it. If you pressure her later she’s likely to pull away. But if you do take it slow and show her that it’s her time, attention and affection you want she’ll warm to you. Lots of guys shower their lady with simple compliments that can frankly be applied to anyone. The trick is to make your compliments as specific as possible. Tell her you love the way the undertones of her skin make her radiate. But first you’ll have to know what that is. Don’t just talk about her eyes but that certain look she gives you, the way her eyes crease when she smiles, or something unique about their color. If you really want to turn a woman on make her feel special, unique and one-of-a-kind. Let her know how great she looks after the act. That will make an impression.

Use the word “you” and work it into whatever you are saying. Don’t tell her “That feels amazing” tell her “You feel amazing.” Instead of “I love how that feels.” Say “I love what you do to me.” Always put the focus on her. She will get more turned on, be more enthusiastic and that means more extra-special attention for you. According to psychotherapist Daylle Deanna Schwartz, “‘You’ is sexy because you’re referring to her as opposed to the act of sex. It’s very personal, and women love that.” Ms. Schwartz is author of the book How to Please a Woman in and out of Bed. When she’s going down on you or trying to please you in some way, don’t go stoic on her. Reinforce her. Women need to be supported emotionally. They want to know what they are doing pleases you. Moan a little, even if you aren’t a moaner to direct her and keep her at what you like. Say how good she makes you feel what she does that thing that you like. Incorporate dirty talk and directions together. Now instead of asking her should you disrobe her, tell her in a cute and charming way, “I’m going to take off all of your clothes, starting with this.” Women like it when men take initiative in bed. If she protests or you offend her at some point, and what guy won’t, give her a quick apology or make a joke (even better) and move lightly on.

The Secret to the Most Fulfilling sex you’ve ever had

Lots of guys have that wild time or two in the back of their mind, the super-secret vault of spank action. Usually you stumble upon a scenario and all of a sudden you are caught up in it, an accidental threesome with two female friends, the tryst with the older woman, the time you made a sex tape with an ex, or when you and a high school girlfriend snuck out and went skinny dipping, getting it on in the water and hoping you didn’t get caught. Those are great memories that will last a lifetime. But lots of guys also have unfulfilled fantasies that they don’t want to bring up with their wife or girlfriend, or don’t know how to broach the subject. The real secret to the most fulfilling sex you’ve ever had is to share those fantasies with her no matter how perverted or strange you think she’ll find them. Truth is she’s probably got some dirty or weird fantasies of her own she’s scared to share with you. You have to have developed a relationship to a certain point for this to work. You have to be comfortable and close with one another. There has to be a deep bond of trust. It’s actually the sign of a healthy relationship if both of you can open up and share your fantasies. It’s even better when you have an understanding, loving, attentive lover who wants to please you, and be pleased by you.

Do not approach her with some list, pressure her or overwhelm her all at once. If you haven’t done anything kinky, springing it on her that you want her to be your mistress, wear spiked leather gloves and spank you with a paddle may be jumping too far ahead. Instead, start out small. Work into things. Start with the mild things and work slowly up the list. Say you want to make love out-of-doors. Discuss it with her as you would discuss any of your fantasies. Talk about hers first. If you make fantasy talk about her and your desire to fulfill her needs and wishes, she’ll be willing and enthusiastic about fulfilling yours. So if you want to make love to her outdoors, once she asks you about this bring it up. At first, she may reject the idea. Don’t pressure her. Tell her other subtler ones. Then here and there start whispering sexy and naughty things in her ear when you’re out and about. Tell her not to wear underwear one night and whisper how you know and how it turns you on. Later on, start touching her under the table, leg perhaps and work your way around to other areas. Make sure you’ve selected a secluded spot for when she’s ready to move things to the next level. This same process can be done for almost any fantasy. Talk to her about fantasies, first about hers, then yours. Fulfill one of hers to the best of your ability. And then work her into yours. Make her feel comfortable, make her feel sexy, make her yours and she’ll make you hers.

Don’t Use these Techniques to Lengthen Bedroom Performance

2015-01-22

It’s no secret, a lot of guys want to last longer in bed. One of the most common problems is a man finishing before his partner is satisfied. There are lots of tried and true techniques to help, some physical others mental. There may also be an underlying health condition, especially if no matter what you have tried nothing works. At this point, it pays to seek out a physician. There are some methods out there that guys try thinking they will work, but end up making the problem worse. Don’t use these techniques to lengthen your bedroom performance. Otherwise, things can go south fast. The first is drinking too much.Lots of guys like to ease the tension by having a few drinks. This can alleviate anxiety and make you feel more confident. But consuming too much alcohol decreases blood flow, which is vital for forming an erection. Instead, use some mental tricks and deep breathing exercises to relieve anxiety and boost confidence. The most successful athletes picture themselves being successful, and visualize all the steps in their performance before taking part. Do the same and your bedroom performance is sure to improve.

Some say it’s a good idea to think about something else during sex. Baseball was the topic they would say to concentrate on in the olden days to divert one’s attention. But conjuring up chores, sports, work and even bad experiences may have the opposite effect. You may fail to perform at all. What’s more, this technique marries unpleasant or uninteresting thoughts with sex, which could lead to further problems. Instead, change up your repertoire. Perhaps orally or digitally stimulate your partner. Include toys. Slow things down. Spend more time on foreplay. Really get your partner excited before penetration occurs. Your partner is liable to enjoy sex more, you will feel more confident and your performance will improve. Stop and switch positions when you feel it coming on too soon. Some men pull out and press firmly just underneath the head of the penis in order to stave off orgasm. Then there are numbing creams and gels and special condoms. Experiment and find a technique that works for you.

Do you suffer from Balanitis?

2015-01-20

If you are uncircumcised, and are experiencing swelling of the head of the penis along with the foreskin, you may be suffering from balanitis. It is also known as balanoposthitis. This usually occurs when the area underneath the foreskin is not washed regularly. Bacteria and sweat can build up causing irritation. Another cause is an allergy to certain soaps or personal care products. These can cause the head of the penis–the glands to swell.  A yeast infection can also cause this disorder to occur. Arthritis may be at the root of the problem. It can also happen as a result of a sexually transmitted infection (STI). People with certain conditions such as diabetes mellitus are more likely to develop balanitis. Symptoms include itching, redness, pain and irritation of the penis. Some experience a malodorous discharge as well. If you believe you may have balanitis or are experiencing any of these symptoms, see a healthcare professional right away.

Balanitis is diagnosed through taking the person’s medical history, and performing a physical exam. No further tests are generally required. If an underlying health problem is at fault, the doctor may request blood work to be done. When hygiene is at issue, there may be need for some retraining on how to pull back and clean the foreskin and the area beneath. Changing the soap you use to a milder version can also help, especially if it is caused by an allergy. Generally speaking, to clear up the issue a topical cream is prescribed. For STIs as the root cause, an antibiotic may also be administered. If the problem chronically returns, the physician might suggest circumcision as a way to prevent future infection of the foreskin. For most causes however, balanitis can be prevented. Usually this condition is nothing to worry about so long as you seek out medical attention. Be sure to seek out a physician if you believe you may have balanitis.