Large Penis Misconceptions

2014-08-11

Penis anxiety is rampant in our culture. Ask any man you know well enough their size and see how many tell you average, or even small. The idea of being told you have a small penis is an absolute affront to a man’s masculinity. But how much does the size of one’s unit really count in the bedroom, and how much is part of a large penis misconception weaved into the fabric of our society? Studies have shown that size doesn’t equate to a better relationship or more sexual satisfaction on the part of partners. It could make a partner feel gratitude and you confidence. But it could also lead to overconfidence, meaning one doesn’t listen to and isn’t in tune with one’s partner, in which case the partner’s satisfaction diminishes. One Kenyan survey found that wives were more likely to cheat if their husband’s member was too large, as it caused too much pain, so they weren’t able to feel sexual pleasure or satisfaction. Though many men in our culture and a few women called “size queens” are also obsessed with large penises, most women find that they take a lot of preparation for. What’s more, it isn’t always comfortable or even pleasurable for them.  Men’s Health columnist Nicole Beland said, “Yes, we care about the size of a man’s penis. But when it comes to sexual satisfaction, it’s pretty far down on our list of priorities.”

A recent Australian National University study recently stated that women like bigger penises. But what the media failed to focus on was that the results found that what women prefer is within the range of average to slightly bigger than average. Female attraction actually declined after a certain size. Women also preferred this average to larger size in proportion to a man’s body. They preferred slightly taller men and the size corresponded. This goes with the generally accepted view, though not scientifically accepted that proportionality is attractive, as much as body symmetry is. Though pornography has come to glorify large penises, porn certainly is not real life. In fact, many young men growing up in the age of always accessible internet porn get many misconceptions about sex from these videos. Instead of letting porn tell you what sex should be like, or what preferences people should have, why not investigate what you and your partner like yourselves? It should be a wonderful, exciting journey rather than an anxiety ridden checklist-oriented activity. Some women find that men with large penises though exciting can’t live up to the hype they’ve been given. Sex is not only about penetration. Only one quarter of women can orgasm through regular sex. Most need digital or oral stimulation to reach climax. What’s more, there are techniques to satisfy a woman you can use no matter your size. To truly be the best lover, it isn’t the equipment you’re carrying. What makes the best lover is being relaxed, confident, positive, giving, responsive, open-minded and generous with your partner.

How do you Know When you’re a Sex Addict?

Our society often tells us men want it all the time. But where do you draw the line between a healthy sex drive and obsession? Up to one in 25 men have what is called hypersexuality, or an intense sex drive. Though it didn’t make it in the latest tome of psychological disorders the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM) V, it in fact does exist and the newest research claims that it should be viewed as a psychological disorder. A new British study found that when sex addicts watch porn under brain scans, their brains show similar patterns to drug addicts who need their substance, regardless of when it is pleasurable or not. As time goes on, an addict’s brain changes, reshaping the pleasure pathways of the brain and making the addict more driven to finding the object of their addiction, which is why they need the substance or stimulus so badly. But a 2013 UCLA study found that some people are more easily aroused than others. In this study those who self-identified as sex addicts showed a stronger response to sexual images than what they had themselves reported. Researcher in UCLA’s department of Psychiatry and Biobehavioral Sciences and the study’s author Nicole Prause, Ph.D said, “People with a high sexual desire probably have a predisposition to seek out sex because it feels better to them neurologically.”

Even if you feel like you can never get enough, you don’t necessarily have hypersexuality. So how do you know when you’re a sex addict or just a normal guy? If you feel like your sex drive affects those around you negatively or if you are unable to control your sexual desire than you may have this condition.When you can’t draw the line and it starts to affect your job, your relationships, your family or your life in an adverse way, it is time to seek help. Prause says, “Even statistically non-normal behaviors, like masturbating three times a day, may not cause distress or problems in a person’s life.” A problem occurs then when it affects you or those around you negatively. That’s when it’s time to seek out a therapist or a sex therapist. Of course there isn’t exactly a specific diagnosis one can use to determine hypersexuality. Nor is there a specific cure for this condition. But therapy can overcome any behavioral issue so it’s the best way to go. What’s more, if left untreated the problem can and does get worse. A licensed therapist who specializes in sexual disorders should be sought out for hypersexuality. Otherwise, if you just have a strong libido, chalk it up to a superior male virility.

When is Delayed Ejaculation Cause for Concern?

2014-08-07

Delayed or impaired ejaculation is a condition where it takes an extended amount of sexual stimulation for a man to reach orgasm and ejaculate. There are even those men who never reach climax. What’s more, impaired ejaculation can be a temporary problem, or can last a lifetime. Medications, surgeries and certain medical conditions can cause delayed ejaculation. Treating the issue depends very much on the root cause. This condition is only a health issue if it interferes with you or your partner’s sexual satisfaction and fulfillment. There are men with delayed ejaculation who take thirty minutes or more to reach orgasm. Others can’t ejaculate at all, a condition known as anejaculation in medical terminology. The most common type of delayed ejaculation is when a man can’t orgasm during intercourse but he can climax during digital or oral stimulation. There are even men who can only reach orgasm through masturbation. The first two differentiations are whether this condition is an acquired condition due to a certain medical condition for instance, but before sexual functioning was normal. If it has always been like this, since a man came to sexual maturity, it is called lifelong delayed ejaculation. Next there is generalized and situational types. Generalized is when it happens no matter the stimulation or sexual partner, situational only occurs with certain kinds of stimulation or partners.

You should see a physician or specialist, such as a urologist when you think your medication is causing impaired ejaculation, when you think you have an underlying health condition that may be causing it, or when it is causing problems for you, your partner or your relationship. For physical causes; a birth defect, injury, infection, heart disease, hormone related conditions and prostate surgery are some reasons why this condition can occur. For psychological reasons; performance anxiety, depression, religious or cultural taboos, differences between reality and fantasy may all be reasons causing the condition. Also certain medications such as diuretics, antidepressants, blood pressure medications, antipsychotic medication and substance abuse problems such as alcoholism can cause the issue. Be sure to see your primary healthcare provider. Write down all the questions you have before your appointment. Make sure to list all the symptoms you have had. You may even want to take your partner with you so that they can give more information or fill in the blanks of anything you might have missed. Let them know when the problem started, how long you’ve been having it for, how exactly it works for you, and if it is situational or happens all the time. Your doctor will likely give you a physical exam, a blood test and take a urine sample for urinalysis. There are medications to solve the problem. Also, psychotherapy or sex therapy may alleviate the issue.

Self-Help Can Cure Premature Ejaculation

2014-08-05

From his teen years until about 60 years of age, premature ejaculation (PE) is a man’s number one sexual complaint. About a third of American men experience PE. After 60 years of age erectile dysfunction becomes a much more prevalent issue for some men. According to a University of Chicago study, 20-25% of older men also experience premature ejaculation. So what can be done to combat premature ejaculation? Unlike erectile dysfunction, PE isn’t necessarily an underlying sign of a larger health problem. Still, it is important to see your doctor should you be experiencing PE for an extended period of time, say weeks or even months. However, it could be a matter best up to a psychologist or sex therapist. Most studies show that sex therapy clears up the issue 80% of the time. Some therapists claim they have a 90% success rate. However, sex therapy can be expensive. Overcoming the root causes can take several months of therapy. At $100 per hour you could have a bill of around $1,500 when all is said and done. Due to the elevated price tag, many seek a variety of sources in order to administer self-help. Self-help methods can certainly cure premature ejaculation, if you are patient, thorough and open-minded, and you’re willing to seek out a variety of methods which could undo your issue.

Research suggests that self-help resources can undo PE for about two thirds who attempt it. However, professional counseling is much more effective. There are online resources. Also, there are books you can purchase online or at your local bookstore. Many people mistakenly believe that PE has something to do with the relationship or a psychological disorder. In truth, it’s just a small issue that can be overcome with the help of products, therapy, or exercises and techniques.Some men take it as a blow to their ego, which in turn gives them performance anxiety, exacerbating the problem. If the problem is psychological, such as to do with low self-esteem, low self-image or anxiety, perhaps a counselor may be best. It could be that one is very excited at the prospect of intercourse. In this case, try to concentrate on your partner. Plan out a lot of foreplay. Use mental techniques to make yourself last longer. Use the technique called “edging” in which you stop, then start again in order to reset yourself and make your orgasm that much stronger. Do kegel exercises. Strengthening the pelvic floor isn’t just for women anymore. In fact, strong kegel muscles can help stave off ejaculation. If it is due to sensitivity, there are many brands of numbing agents on the market, available at sex shops and pharmacies. Make sure to use it as directed or else, you may be numbing your partner by mistake. Numbing condoms are also on the market. Finally, there are tantric sex techniques that can help. See if you and your partner are interested in learning more about tantric exercises.

Maintaining Proper Groin Hygiene

Unfortunately, due to the fact that it’s caught in a warm, moist, dark place all day, your nether regions are the perfect environment to grow bacteria, especially the kind that emit odor. No time is this more prevalent than in the hot and humid days of summer. George Washington University dermatologist Kelley Pagliai Redbord M.D. says, “Sweat and moisture mix with the natural bacteria on your skin to cause body odor.” The groin has within it apocrine glands which when combined with sweat can produce some alarming odors. Though you may have never heard any complaints, it’s important to make sure no unseemly smells are lurking below the surface of your underwear. You certainly do not want your partner turned off by the idea of oral sex. What’s more, one bad experience can ruin the reputation of an otherwise amazing guy. Here are some strategies you can imply to eliminate or prevent odor. Pubic hair can not only trap moisture, it can capture smells as well. That’s why it may be a good idea to employ a little manscaping down there. You want the skin to be dry and cool. You certainly do not have to be bald down there. But a little trimming to keep it nice and neat and not give moisture, bacteria or odors a place to hide will not only keep things fresh down there, it will make the area look more attractive, and perhaps more inviting.

Southern Illinois University urologist Tobias Köhler, M.D. says it’s important to spend time cleaning the area properly. There are many folds and crevices so do it justice and spend a little more time and energy on that area during your daily shower. Köhler says, “Don’t just wipe some soap on the area. Use some pressure and get into all those crevices.” Redbord adds that if you are uncircumcised, be sure to attend to the area underneath the foreskin and to clean it out well. After your shower, dry the groin area well, particularly in summer. Just a little talcum or baby powder might do the trick as well. “Reduce moisture, and you’ll reduce body odor,” says Redbord. She even suggests that after you shower, use a blow dryer to get it completely dry. Be careful and be sure to hold the device an arm’s length away. Burns are never nice but there are some places you really don’t want to get one. Wear breathable underwear. Cotton is always a good option. In the heat and humidity of summer, Redbord even suggests using a little underarm deodorant down there, applied underneath the scrotum to eliminate odor and keep the region moisture free.

Common Questions about the Male Anatomy

2014-07-28

Having “blue balls” is just a term for being sexually frustrated. Yet, if you ever have noticed any discoloration such as the testicles appearing to be a shade darker, accompanied by a low, dull pain, medical experts believe that the buildup of blood flow to the male sex organs puts pressure on the testicles if not released. Simple ejaculation can relieve the pressure. Having an erection for a long time could also make oxygen in the blood become absorbed in the genitals making the blood in that area appear bluish. However, this is not normal without say a penis ring or some other toy that restricts blood flow or when taking erectile dysfunction drugs such as Viagra. Blue balls is just one of the common questions lots of guys have about the male anatomy that they often never get answered, at least not in the medical sense. Another normal questions men often ask is how long it should take after having an orgasm to be able to perform again.  According to Weill Cornell Medical College urologist Richard K. Lee, M.D. “Unless you’re 14, you’re probably going to need at least an hour or two to become erect after ejaculating.” A man’s “latency period” can also be prolonged by alcohol intake or previous masturbation. If it takes far longer than a few hours, like days for the equipment to be active again, you should definitely bring the matter up with your physician.

Lots of guys wonder what the penis’s most sensitive area is. According to research out of Michigan State University, it depends whether or not you are circumcised. The small incision area on the underside of the head is the most sensitive place if you have been circumcised. For those that haven’t been, the entire head will be extremely sensitive. The head of an uncircumcised penis is covered in foreskin and so remains sensitive. However, a circumcised one comes into contact with your underwear and other substances making it less sensitive. Lastly, a lot of men want to know how much semen should be released when they ejaculate. Luckily, scientists have an answer. It should be somewhere between 1.5 to 5 cubic centimeters or around one fifth of an ounce. If the amount of semen you are ejaculating seems rather small by comparison, try to space out your orgasms says Dr. Lee. A man’s testosterone level plays a role in semen production as well. As men grow older their testosterone level drops mildly over many years. This is a natural phenomenon. But it often reduces the amount of semen produced and therefore ejaculated after sexual intercourse. Some men are suspect about this phenomenon but it’s a normal, natural occurrence. However, if you do experience significantly less ejaculate after your orgasms and the drop is precipitous, you should consult a physician or your urologist about it.

Syphilis is on the Rise

The rate of syphilis today is on the rise, being twice that of what it was at its lowest point in the U.S. in the year 2000. Mainly the rise is among men who have sex with men (MSM) bisexual and gay men, while the rates continue to plummet for all other groups. Johns Hopkins University School of Medicine professor Jonathan Zenilman, MD told MedPage Today, “Syphilis has gone from being a disease of heterosexual inner-city folks (prostitutes and their clients, for instance) to primarily a disease of gay men.” There are many important factors to consider here. First, these men generally tend to have a lot of partners. They have unprotected or riskier sex more often and there are a large number of members in this community that are HIV positive. This isn’t exactly a phenomenon without precedent. In fact, we saw a rise in syphilis in the MSM community before, in the free-wheeling 70’s. HIV/AIDS was what put the kibosh on that, and made gay and bisexual men limit the number of partners and take part in protected and less risky sex. The fear of contracting HIV helped and the precautions that ensued helped to decrease the rates of other sexually transmitted diseases. But today the CDC says syphilis has made an impressive comeback. Today the rate is 5.3 cases per 100,000 people, double the rate it was in 2000 when the rate was 2.1 cases per 100,000. Men attributed 91% to the rise in syphilis between 2005 and 2013, with men ages 20 to 24 years old playing a key role.

According to Dr. Zenilman, “When a sexually transmitted disease starts rising, there are three central questions to be asked. Did the bug change? Did the people change? And was there a public health management or structural change?” Gonorrhea evolved, making it antibiotic resistant to many but for a few drugs. But Syphilis hasn’t changed and the treatment remains the same, a single shot of Benzathine penicillin G, and three shots for a secondary case. Syphilis takes two to three weeks to develop after the initial infection. According to Zenilman there’s no reason to be alarmed as “you can pretty much control an epidemic.” But what has changed is society. With the advent of social media it’s easier for those in the MSM community to find each other and have anonymous sex. The fear of HIV contraction has decreased and so gay and bisexual men are having riskier sex than they once did. In San Francisco for instance, HIV testing is routine, it’s become part of the culture. But there’s still a stigma attached to syphilis. Doctors recommend being tested every three to six months for the disease for someone who is MSM. There are many men today who with social media, dating apps and websites meet partners with ease. So they may not have all the information to let someone know about a problem or an issue that may affect their health. San Francisco Department of Public Health has been using AOL chat rooms and other means to let the anonymous sexual partners of infected people know that they need to get tested.

Those Over 60 are Still Sexually Active

2014-07-22

Britain’s TV network Channel 4 recently conducted a study that claims that those over 60 years of age are still sexually active and this study may reveal a phenomenon also happening on this side of the pond. This was true no matter their sexual orientation. It may run against conventional wisdom but in fact, those who conducted the study claimed that these folks in their 60’s and 70’s were experiencing a sexual Renaissance. 500 Britains over age 60 were polled and 76 participants were interviewed in-depth. The results of this study will be a show on Channel 4 called the “Secret Sex Lives of Parents and Grandparents.” 51% of those polled were still active sexually, with many of these experiencing a rebirth in that area of their lives. Vikki, 70, was quoted in saying, “I can say that sometimes in the street I think ‘oh yeah, that would be a nice person to go to bed with.’” A gay man, Joey, 69, from London said of his sex life and the reason why he decided to rekindle it, “I got to a point where I thought I’m going to kick the bucket fairly soon.” So he decided to get on the casual encounters app Grindr. “I’m averaging, I would say, four men a week,” he told the Channel 4 program. Though they themselves may feel sexually liberated, this age group doesn’t find society approving of it.

Many women feel that they can’t be seen as sexual beings after menopause. 67-year-old Margaret told the program, “We still feel as though we have a right to be a sexual being as well as everything else. We’re not just grannies. I’m not anyway! Younger people nowadays must think ‘oh god, that’s gross, you know, granny’s at it.”‘ Peter in his 70’s at that time, and Stella met online and got married—a story that is becoming less and less unusual for this age group. After years of abstinence Peter found it a bit nerve wracking to try again. He explains, “I can remember sitting on the sofa with Stella and discussing this and saying well I really don’t know whether anything works anymore. So we decided to find out basically.” Just like with every other age group, the internet has made dating and hooking up much easier. But as a result, just like in other age groups the age 50-90 year old set is seeing an increase in sexually transmitted diseases, a rate that has doubled in a decade. According to sexual health nurse consultant Justin Gaffney, “There is a degree of naivety in the older population in that they just don’t see that they are at risk of sexual infections.” In fact, as they age older people become more susceptible to STDs. Another problem, older people may be less educated as they younger compatriots about sex. One problem Gaffney explains is that he has seen cases where older people have used common household items; cooking oil, shampoo and hand cream as lube. However, these can cause rashes or even be damaging to such sensitive areas. According to Gaffney, “There does need to be perhaps a focus on trying to make services more older people-friendly.”