All posts by SRH Matters

Exercises that Boost the Libido

Exercises that Boost the Libido

2014-07-17

Commercials don the airwaves about ED drugs and articles fill websites and newspapers about ways to boost the libido, but there are exercises that can do so, and without any harmful side effects. If you want a stronger sex drive, work an exercise regimen into your weekly routine. Doctors say about a half hour a day five days per week will keep you in tip-top shape. For those men who do take medication for erectile dysfunction, exercise is often recommended in tandem with the medicine. In one study, men who exercised after receiving hormone therapy to treat prostate cancer were far more likely to enjoy sexual activity than those who were not active. What’s more, losing weight can really help boost the libido. Many doctors and urologists say lifestyle changes such as eating a healthy diet, getting plenty of exercise, sleeping an adequate amount and controlling stress can turn ED around. Extra fat, particularly around the abdomen, absorbs testosterone. What’s more, it tells the brain to stop producing the sex hormone. But losing weight helps release more testosterone into the blood stream. Testosterone is not only the male sex hormone, it is linked with desire. One study suggests stretching and deep breathing could also improve the libido. In this study, 80 male participants were split into two groups. Those that took part in stretching and deep breathing exercises enjoyed stronger sexual desire.

Kegels or pelvic floor exercises aren’t just for women anymore. They can increase the male sexual experience as well. Kegels strengthen the muscles of the pelvic floor, the muscles of the lower abdomen which control the bladder and the rectum as well. Kegel exercises were once only used to help women in labor. Now they also strengthen the lower muscles for both men and women in order to experience greater sexual pleasure. Those men who have had a prostatectomy can use Kegel exercises to regain control of the muscles down there again and help restore sexual function. There are many articles and videos on how to do them online. You can practice them in traffic, in meetings, or anywhere and no one will ever know. Do you get enough sunlight? Not only does ten minutes a day in the sun create enough vitamin D in your body for the day, it also increases neurotransmitter production, alertness, and increases your energy level. Daily sunlight exposure, exercise and the proper amount of dietary protein have been determined to be as effective as medical treatments according to some studies. Remember that the biggest erogenous zone is the mind. So relieve yourself of stress in healthy ways such as getting exercise. Anxiety and depression are emotional issues that can sink your libido. Find natural, healthy ways to relieve these and give your libido a boost. Some calming exercises like yoga for instance can help.yoga

What Body Sounds to Listen for

What Body Sounds to Listen for

The human body can make a lot of weird sounds, pops, whistles and creaks among many others. Some of these you can ignore, others mean a more serious health issue may be behind it. So how can you tell which ones are worrisome and which others you can ignore? Here are what body sounds to listen for to safeguard your health and to know when something might be up. Are you a snorer? The sound of snoring is caused by vibration of the soft tissue of the mouth and throat in tandem with your breathing. Nasal strips or sprays can help. But losing weight helps so much more. If you notice that you are feeling sleepy all day, you wake up in a sweat or wake up gasping, chances are you have a serious condition called sleep apnea. Stroke, diabetes and other serious conditions can result. If this is happening to you see a doctor right away. There are treatments such as surgery, sleeping with a CPAP machine or an in-office procedure called pillar implants. Do your knees or ankles crack or pop? Three things can cause this to happen. Fluid could be shifting causing gas bubbles to pop, your joints could be off track, or it could be a tendon or tendons making a snapping sound as they move over your joints. If it becomes swollen, locked or painful, seek out a doctor. In an ankle it could be arthritis or tendon damage.

Does your stomach gurgle, grumble or growl between meals? Don’t worry, this is just the normal process of the stomach and intestines cleaning themselves out and getting rid of any debris or detritus that might be leftover. If you aren’t hungry you shouldn’t eat.  If you have any swelling or pain that goes with it however, you should see a doctor. If you hear a sloshing sound when the abdomen is pressed, seek out a physician right away. Rarely does it happen but if the bowels have contracted too much or too little there may be a blockage which could need surgery. Does your jawbone pop or click? This could mean that your jaw’s hinge, called the temporomandibular joint could be misaligned. But that doesn’t mean it’s a problem necessarily. If your jaw gets locked shut or if you can’t close or open it all the way, see a physician. If you grind your teeth at night you may need a mouth guard. Avoid things that test your jaw such as steak, taffy, gum or any other chewy foods. Have you ever heard your nose whistle? It’s generally a sign of congestion either from a cold or allergies. It means the space for air in your nose is narrow. If it happens after an injury however you should see your healthcare provider as it could be a perforated septum or a tear in the thin layer between the nostrils. Lastly, a ringing, buzzing or humming in the ears could signal tinnitus. Being around loud noise for extended periods without protection can damage the inner ear. It’s best to wear ear plugs any time you are around loud noises. Most however have no cause and there isn’t any cure to date. So don’t bother going to your doctor about it.stk84601cor

ED and Statins

ED and Statins

20% of men in their 40’s suffer from erectile dysfunction (ED), making it far more common than you think. An unhealthy lifestyle can certainly cause ED. Oftentimes ED comes on occasionally or mildly and a man will experience if from time to time. Most men don’t discuss this issue with their friends or others for support due to embarrassment. But it is actually quite common at this age. There are those men who fail to bring up the issue with their doctor either. But this is a huge mistake. ED can be an early warning sign of another, deeper issue. Heart disease, hypertension, smoking, diabetes and dyslipidemia can all be underlying and far more serious, even life threatening issues that may be causing ED. Two main arteries run across the side of the penis supplying it with blood which in turn create an erection. These are thinner than the coronary arteries or those of the heart. So it makes sense that these arteries would be occluded meaning strained due to plaque buildup way before the coronary arteries in the heart. Oftentimes urologists actually use the severity of ED to see how bad the development of heart disease has gotten, called schemic heart disease. There are lots of factors that contribute such as an unhealthy diet, a sedentary lifestyle and a lack of exercise.

If you are experiencing this problem and it is determined that an early onset of heart disease is the cause, your doctor may prescribe a statin. These are medicines that lower a person’s bad cholesterol level thereby limiting the fatty deposits or plaque that buildup in the arteries. Statins are very effective in controlling one’s cholesterol level. According to the National Institute for Health and Care Excellence (NICE), 10% of those who risk a heart attack within the next ten years should be put on a statin. Most physicians believe statins have minor to moderate side effects though a recent study in the British Medical Journal found that 20% of harmful side effects occur due to the overuse of statins. Insomnia, nausea, fatigue and muscle aches are the most common side effects. The advantages of using this medication though far outweigh the drawbacks according to most physicians. There are varying reports as to whether ED is alleviated or made worse through the use of statins. Many patients say they experience ED after taking a statin for a week. Another report found that statins improved the hardness of an erection by 30%. There are erectile dysfunction medications available for those who experience ED on a statin.Regular exercise, losing weight, a healthy diet and taking care of your emotional and psychological health can help combat or even alleviate ED as well.

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First Ever Premature Ejaculation Medication

First Ever Premature Ejaculation Medication

Premature ejaculation (PE) is a common male sexual dysfunction. This can be defined as ejaculation soon after penetration during intercourse leading to a lack of sexual fulfillment on the part of one or both parties. PE can severely hurt a man’s self-esteem, relationship and decrease his quality of life significantly. It can be caused by psychological factors such as performance anxiety. There are also physical factors that may cause it. Or it can be a combination of the two. It can also be caused by physiological problems. Serotonin, the neurotransmitter often thought of as responsible for happiness and a sense of well-being, is also a chemical messenger carrying messages across the central nervous system. Messages can make it across synapses or the gaps between nerve cells known as neurons due to this neurotransmitter. Research has shown that having adequate serotonin in the body delays ejaculation. Patients who suffer from premature ejaculation have low levels of serotonin. Dapoxetine is a new medication, the first ever developed to conquer premature ejaculation. Dapoxetine increases serotonin in the synapses helping to alleviate the symptoms of PE. Men with PE between the ages of 18 and 64 can take dapoxetine. This isn’t a medication you take all of the time. Instead it is what is called “dose on demand.” You take it as needed. It should be taken one to three hours before partaking in sexual activity.

This drug has been proven to work on the initial dose. 6,000 men have taken it and it is now available in 50 countries around the world. The drug doesn’t accumulate in the body. Instead it dissipates quickly. If you are experiencing PE talk to your doctor or urologist.  Physicians use the Premature Ejaculation Diagnostic Tool (PEDT), a questionnaire consisting of five questions to help diagnose PE and recommend the proper treatment. Don’t just rely on a doctor or specialist. Take control of your own health and condition. Think about whether or not you think the root of the problem may be psychological or physiological. Understand that there are also other things you can do to help control PE. Kegel pelvic floor exercises, once the realm of helping women give birth and recover from birth, are also recommended for men with PE or that experience urinary incontinence. The strengthening of this muscle and controlling it can help stave off orgasm. There are numbing agents, creams, gels and special condoms that you can use to help make you last longer. Make sure to follow the directions carefully or else you may be numbing your partner as well. If the issue is psychological, counseling may help. Depression, anxiety and stress can all lead to PE. Using other sexual techniques or switching up your sexual repertoire may also help.

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The Medical Tests Every Man Needs

The Medical Tests Every Man Needs

2014-07-15

By Amanda MacMillan
Photo by Getty Images

Admit it, guys: You don’t even like going to the doctor when there’s something wrong, let alone for preventative check-ups. But being proactive about your health—by getting recommended screenings for serious conditions and diseases—could mean you’ll spend less time at the doctor’s office down the road.

Depending on age, family history, and lifestyle factors, people need different tests at different times in their lives. Here’s a good overview for all men to keep in mind.

Diabetes

You may never need a screening for diabetes if you maintain a healthy weight and have no other risk factors for the disease (such as high cholesterol or high blood pressure). But for most men over 45—especially overweight men—a fasting plasma glucose test, or an A1C test, is a good idea, says Kevin Polsley, MD, assistant professor of internal medicine at Loyola University Health System in Chicago.

The U.S. Department of Health and Human Services also recommends diabetes screenings for overweight adults younger than 45 who have a family history of the disease, or who are of African American, Asian American, Latino, Native American, or Pacific Islander descent.

Fasting plasma glucose and A1C are both blood tests that should be done in your doctor’s office. The A1C test does not require fasting beforehand, but if your doctor wants to test you using fasting plasma glucose, you will be asked not to eat or drink anything but water for eight hours beforehand.

Sexually Transmitted Infections

Even if you’ve been in a monogamous relationship for years, it’s not a bad idea to get tested if you haven’t already done so. Many common sexually transmitted infections can go undiagnosed for years. For example, people can go as long as 10 years without showing symptoms of HIV. The U.S. Preventive Services Task Force recommends that everyone ages 15 to 65 be screened for HIV at least once. This is especially important, Dr. Polsley says, if you have had unprotected sex, used injected drugs, or had a blood transfusion between 1978 and 1985.

In addition, the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention recommends a one-time hepatitis C screening for all adults born between 1945 and 1965, regardless of risk factors. “Believe it or not, there’s a lot of hepatitis C cases out there in which people either don’t have symptoms yet or don’t know what’s causing their symptoms,” says Dr. Polsley. “Screening for STIs is something I offer as routine at just about every physical, regardless of a patient’s age or health history.”

Body Mass Index

You don’t need to make an appointment to figure out your body mass index, a measure of body fat based on your height and weight. Regardless of whether you calculate this stat yourself or your physician does the math for you, it’s important to be aware of this number, says Dr. Polsley.

A BMI between 18.5 and 24.9 is considered normal weight. Although this calculation isn’t perfect—and can sometimes label healthy people as overweight or vice versa—most doctors agree that it’s still an important component of assessing overall health. “It can be a very good opportunity to discuss diet and exercise, and to show our patients how important these things are,” Dr. Polsley says.

Cholesterol 

The American Heart Association recommends men have their cholesterol levels tested every four to six years once they turn 20. “Men have an overall higher risk for cardiovascular disease than women, and high cholesterol is often a big part of that,” Dr. Polsley says. But your doctor may want to screen you earlier (and more often) if you have heart disease risk factors such as diabetes, tobacco use, or high blood pressure.

Cholesterol is measured by a blood test, and your doctor may ask you not to eat for 9 to 12 hours beforehand. Generally, a cholesterol test will measure your levels of total cholesterol, HDL (good) cholesterol, LDL (bad) cholesterol, and triglycerides. Depending on your results, your doctor may make dietary recommendations or prescribe a cholesterol-lowering medication like a statin.

Blood Pressure

Like high cholesterol, high blood pressure is often a symptomless condition—but luckily, the test for hypertension is quick and painless, involving a rubber cuff that squeezes the arm and measures the flow of blood through a large artery in the bicep. “You should have your blood pressure checked pretty much every time you see your doctor,” says Dr. Polsley, starting at age 18.

Don’t get to the doc often? Have it checked at least every two years, or yearly if your numbers were previously considered borderline (a top “systolic” number above 120 or bottom “diastolic” number higher than 80).

You can check your blood pressure at health fairs, in pharmacies, or at home with a monitoring device. If your systolic pressure cracks 130 or your diastolic goes over 85, your doctor may recommend lifestyle modifications—like exercising more and eating less salt—or they might prescribe medication.

Colonoscopy 

Most men should be screened for colon cancer beginning at age 50, but those with a family history of the disease may benefit from earlier testing. Men and women alike tend to dread this test—in which a small camera is inserted into the anus and explores the large intestine for polyps or other signs of cancer—but Dr. Polsley says it’s not as bad as it sounds.

“The preparation for the test is actually the worst part,” he says: You’ll need to empty your bowels completely before the exam, which may involve not eating solid foods for one to three days, drinking lots of clear liquids, or taking laxatives. “The actual colonoscopy shouldn’t be too uncomfortable, because you’re sedated through the whole thing.”

But here’s the bright side: If your doctor doesn’t find anything suspicious, you won’t need another colonoscopy for up to 10 years.

Prostate Exam

Screening for prostate cancer is more controversial than for other cancers, says Dr. Polsley, and some studies have shown that these tests can be expensive and unnecessary, and may do more harm than good. But he suggests that all men over 50 at least talk with their doctors about the pros and cons of these tests—usually either a digital rectal exam (in which the doctor inserts a gloved finger, or digit, into the rectum to feel for lumps and abnormalities) and a PSA test, which measures a protein called prostate-specific antigen in the blood.

Prostate cancer screenings can and do save lives, but they may also result in false-positive or false-negative results. And because many cases of prostate cancer progress very slowly, some men (especially older men) don’t benefit from aggressive treatment. Whether you decide to get screened for prostate cancer should be a decision you make with your doctor, says Dr. Polsley. In the meantime, it’s important to know the symptoms of an enlarged prostate—like having to urinate frequently or having trouble urinating—which could also signal cancer.

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Pains You Should Never Ignore

Pains You Should Never Ignore

A “thunderclap” headache 

Could be: An aneurysm, which is a balloon-like area in an artery

Fix it: If you experience head pain that comes on suddenly and is severe, call 911. (You may also get dizzy and notice blurred vision.) Bleeding in the brain due to a ruptured aneurysm isn’t all that common, but when it does happen, swift action is key. Surgeons can save your life by sealing off the weakened spot. Photo By Getty Images

Tooth pain that wakes you up

Could beTeeth grinding

Fix it: Frequent clenching can cause the nerve within the tooth to become inflamed and the protective enamel to wear away. You might even end up cracking teeth down to the root, which leads to extraction. Call your dentist so he or she can figure out the problem. The complications from grinding, which is often brought on by stress, can be prevented by wearing a night guard.

Dull stomach pain that gets sharper as it moves lower to the right of your abdomen


Could be
Appendicitis

Fix It: If you feel this sensation, go straight to the ER. (Usually it gets more intense over a 24-hour period as it shifts location.) You’re likely going to need surgery-soon. If the appendix bursts, bacteria from the colon can leak into the abdomen, which is dangerous.

Mid-back pain coupled with fever

Could be:
 A kidney infection

Fix it: Don’t assume that your temperature, nausea and back pain are just a stomach bug. This condition develops when bacteria that infiltrate the urinary tract spread to the kidneys, making the infection much more severe. (You might start with UTI symptoms, like pain during urination, but some people don’t notice anything until later.) You’ll likely need antibiotics ASAP, so call your doctor.

A tender spot on your calf


Could be
Deep vein thrombosis (DVT)

Fix it: If one small area of your leg is painful, you could have DVT, a blood clot in the deep veins. (The spot may also be red and warm to the touch.) DVT is more likely if you use birth control pills or recently took a long car or plane ride. Unless your leg is very swollen or the pain is getting worse rapidly, you can probably wait a day to see your doctor instead of going to the ER, but don’t delay any longer. The clot could increase in size-or break off, move toward the lungs and stop blood flow.

Menstrual cramps that don’t get better with medication

Could be: Endometriosis

Fix it: If meds like Advil aren’t helping, this condition-in which tissue grows outside the uterus-might be to blame. Endometriosis impedes fertility, and it’s common (40% to 60% of women whose periods are very painful may have it). Unless you’re trying to conceive, your doc can start you on oral contraceptives. If pain persists, you may need to have the tissue surgically removed.

An unexplained ache between your shoulder blades 

Could beA heart attack

Fix it: About 30% of people who have heart attacks don’t get the classic chest pressure. Pain between shoulder blades is common in women, as is jaw pain, shortness of breath and nausea. If you have these symptoms (you’ll likely have more than one), you need care ASAP. If you think you’re having a heart attack, don’t ask someone to drive you to the hospital-call 911. Emergency responders provide care the moment they reach you.

SOURCES: Alice G. Boghosian, DDS, consumer advisor spokesperson, American Dental Association. Rebekah Gross, MD, clinical assistant professor, NYU Langone Medical Center, New York. Sharonne N. Hayes, MD, professor of medicine and cardiovascular diseases and founder of the Women’s Heart Clinic, Mayo Clinic. Mary Jane Minkin, MD, clinical professor of obstetrics, gynecology and reproductive sciences, Yale School of Medicine.

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Overweight and Pregnant

Overweight and Pregnant

2014-07-08

By 

Pregnancy, or the desire to become pregnant, often inspires women to take better care of themselves — quitting smoking, for example, or eating more nutritiously.

But now many women face an increasingly common problem: obesity, which affects 36 percent of women of childbearing age. In addition to hindering conception, obesity — defined as a body mass index above 30 — is linked to a host of difficul during pregnancy, labor and delivery.

These range from gestational diabetes, hypertension and pre-eclampsia to miscarriage, premature birth, emergency cesarean delivery and stillbirth.

The infants of obese women are more likely to have congenital defects, and they are at greater risk of dying at or soon after birth. Babies who survive are more likely to develop hypertension and obesity as adults.

To be sure, most babies born to overweight and obese women are healthy. Yet a recently published analysis of 38 studies found that even modest increases in a woman’s pre-pregnancy weight raised the risks of fetal death, stillbirth and infant death.

Personal biases and concerns about professional liability lead some obstetricians to avoid obese patients. But Dr. Sigal Klipstein, chairwoman of the committee on ethics of the American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists, says it is time for doctors to push aside prejudice and fear. They must take more positive steps to treat obese women who are pregnant or want to become pregnant.

Dr. Klipstein and her colleagues recently issued a report on ethical issues in caring for obese women. Obesity is commonly viewed as a personal failing that can be prevented or reversed through motivation and willpower. But the facts suggest otherwise.

Although some people manage to shed as much as 100 pounds and keep them off without surgery, many obese patients say they’ve tried everything, and nothing has worked. “Most obese women are not intentionally overeating or eating the wrong foods,” Dr. Klipstein said. “Obstetricians should address the problem, not abandon patients because they think they’re doing something wrong.”

Dr. Klipstein is a reproductive endocrinologist at InVia Fertility Specialists in Northbrook, Ill. In her experience, the women who manage to lose weight are usually highly motivated and use a commercial diet plan.

“But many fail even though they are very anxious to get pregnant and have a healthy pregnancy,” she said. “This is the new reality, and obstetricians have to be aware of that and know how to treat patients with weight issues.”

The committee report emphasizes that “obese patients should not be viewed differently from other patient populations that require additional care or who have increased risks of adverse medical outcomes.” Obese patients should be cared for “in a nonjudgmental manner,” it says, adding that it is unethical for doctors to refuse care within the scope of their expertise “solely because the patient is obese.”

Obstetricians should discuss the medical risks associated with obesity with their patients and “avoid blaming the patient for her increased weight,” the committee says. Any doctor who feels unable to provide effective care for an obese patient should seek a consultation or refer the woman to another doctor.

Obesity rates are highest among women “of lower socioeconomic status,” the report notes, and many obese women lack “access to healthy food choices and opportunities for regular exercise that would help them maintain a normal weight.”

Nonetheless, obese women who want to have a baby should not abandon all efforts to lose weight. Obstetricians who lack expertise in weight management can refer patients to dietitians who specialize in treating weight problems without relying on gimmicks or crash diets, which have their own health risks.

Weight loss is best attempted before a pregnancy. Last year, the college’s committee on obstetric practice advised obstetricians to “provide education about possible complications and encourage obese patients to undertake a weight-reduction program, including diet, exercise, and behavior modification, before attempting pregnancy.”

An obese woman who becomes pregnant should aim to gain less weight than would a normal-weight woman. The Institute of Medicine suggests a pregnancy weight gain of 15 to 25 pounds for overweight women and 11 to 20 pounds for obese women.

Although women should not try to lose weight during pregnancy, “a woman who weighs 300 pounds shouldn’t gain at all,” Dr. Klipstein said. “This is not harmful to the fetus.”

Dr. Klipstein also noted that obesity produces physiological changes that can affect pregnancy, starting with irregular ovulation that can result in infertility.

Obese women are more likely to have problems processing blood sugar, which raises the risk of birth defects and miscarriage. There is also a greater likelihood that their baby will be too large for a vaginal delivery, requiring a cesarean delivery that has its own risks involving anesthesia and surgery.

The babies of obese women are more likely to develop neural tube defects — spina bifida and anencephaly — and to suffer birth injuries like shoulder dystocia, which may occur when the infant is very large.

High blood pressure, more common in obesity, can result in pre-eclampsia during pregnancy, which can damage the mother’s kidneys and cause fetal complications like low birth weight, prematurity and stillbirth.

It is also harder to obtain reliable images on a sonogram when the woman is obese. This can delay detection of fetal or pregnancy abnormalities that require careful monitoring or medical intervention.

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What the Therapist Thinks About You

What the Therapist Thinks About You

 

 David Baldwin wasn’t sure how he had come across the other day in group therapy at the hospital, near the co-op apartment where he lives with his rescue cat, Zoey. He struggles with bipolar disorder, severe anxiety and depression. Like so many patients, he secretly wondered what his therapist thought of him.

But unlike those patients, Mr. Baldwin, 64, was able to find out, swiftly and privately. Pulling his black leather swivel chair to his desk, he logged onto a hospital website and eagerly perused his therapist’s session notes.

The clinical social worker, Stephen O’Neill, wrote that Mr. Baldwin’s self-consciousness about his disorder kept him isolated. Because he longed to connect with others, this was particularly self-defeating, Mr. O’Neill observed. But during the session, he had also discussed how he had helped out neighbors in his co-op.

“This seems greatly appreciated, and he noted his clear enjoyment in helping others,” Mr. O’Neill wrote. “This greatly assists his self-esteem.”

A smile animated Mr. Baldwin’s broad, amiable features. “I have a tough time recognizing that I’ve made progress,” he said. “So it’s nice to read this as a reminder.”

Mental health patients do not have the ready access to office visit notes that, increasingly, other patients enjoy. But Mr. Baldwin is among about 700 patients at Beth Israel Deaconess Medical Center who are participating in a novel experiment.

Within days of a session, they can read their therapists’ notes on their computers or smartphones. The hope is that this transparency will improve therapeutic trust and communication.

“We’re creating a revolution,” said Dr. Tom Delbanco, a professor of medicine at Harvard and a proponent of giving patients access to notes by therapists as well as by physicians. “Some people are aghast.”

The pilot project has raised questions in the mental health community. Which patients will benefit and which might be harmed? How will the notes alter a therapeutic relationship built on face-to-face exchanges? What will be the impact on confidentiality and privacy?

And the project presents difficult choices for those who argue for parity between medical and mental health patients. Should patients with schizophrenia, for example, who may stop taking their medication after reading that they are doing well, have the same access to treatment notes as those with irritable bowel syndrome?

But the lingering underlying question is, do patients really want to know what their therapists think? Dr. Kenneth Duckworth, who is the medical director of the National Alliance on Mental Illness, an advocacy group, said: “I’ve offered to share my notes with patients and they’ll say, ‘No, I’m good.’ But it’s a good concept that should be researched.”

The practice is so new that it is too early for a comprehensive evaluation. The Department of Veterans Affairs, which began making medical and mental health records available online last year, is only just beginning to study the effect on mental health patients.

Older studies from psychiatric wards where patients read charts with doctors found that the patients were confused or offended by the content. But as doctors helped interpret their notes, patientsbegan participating more in their care and trusting their team.

Although Beth Israel therapists report that some patients have no interest in reading their notes, responses from a few have been positive and powerful.

Stacey Whiteman, 52, a former executive secretary in Needham with multiple sclerosis, faces growing cognitive as well as physical difficulties. The disease has shaken her self-image and relationships; her psychological health affects her willingness to manage the disease. She finds that her medical and mental health notes complement each other.

“Yes, the therapy notes can be hard to read, and sometimes I wonder, ‘Really, I said all of that?’ ” she said. “But there’s no question that reading this stuff just charges you back up to moving forward.”

While such a program may be feasible in larger systems like Beth Israel, a Harvard hospital, some solo practitioners fear it may require too much time and technological sophistication.

But Peggy Kriss, a psychologist in Newton, is an early adopter. For over a year she has maintained a website with private pages for patients on which she posts session notes, as well as articles, videos and meditations.

Toward the end of each session, she and the patient begin the note together defining the key points that have been raised.

Dr. Kriss said that for most of her patients, online notes have become the new normal. One described them to her as a security blanket between appointments.

Some write replies. “An O.C.D. patient told me I was spelling things wrong,” Dr. Kriss said. “So I said, ‘I’m just modeling anti-perfectionism for you.’ ”

The Beth Israel project grew out of OpenNotes, a program by Dr. Delbanco and his colleagues that made physicians’ notes accessible to 22,000 patients at three institutions. A 2011 study showed that patients responded positively and became more involved in their care.

More systems are adopting the model. At least three million patients now have swift access to office visit notes, including observations and recommendations.

But even those institutions have hesitated to share mental health notes. Critics have raised concerns about whether reading notes could prompt anxiety and even rejection of treatment. What will happen if the patient posts the notes on Facebook, inviting comment?

Proponents of access point out that such notes, which include extensive diagnostic reports, are already available to other doctors and to insurers.

Although patients have long had the right to their records, the process to obtain copies can be protracted. If a doctor thinks that reading notes would be harmful to the patient or others, they can be withheld.

Mindful of such pitfalls, the Beth Israel psychiatrists have offered notes initially to only 10 percent of patients. Clinical social workers are making notes more widely available, though some therapists have temporarily opted out. Nina Douglass, a social worker in the ob-gyn clinic, worries about patients with abusive partners. If the abuser insisted on reading the notes, the patient could be in danger.

“I can imagine that our work can be deepened and enhanced through people reading their notes,” Ms. Douglass said. “But one size doesn’t fit all.”

Mental health notes have very different readers: the therapist, who may use them as a memory prompt; other doctors treating the patient; insurers; and now the patient. Writing a note with necessary information for all can be daunting.

Mr. O’Neill, the social work manager, is pressing therapists to use straightforward descriptions. “I used ‘affect dysregulation,’ and a patient said, ‘What on earth is that? Are you saying I’m totally crazy?’ ” he said. “It just means they can get upset. So why not use the word ‘upset’?”

Some psychiatrists disagree.

“Diagnostic language is used among doctors to describe features of a mental illness,” said Dr. Brian K. Clinton, an assistant professor at Columbia University Medical Center who has written about sharing records. “I would be willing to discuss with a patient what I think. It’s a better way to communicate than a note I wrote for other doctors.”

But Dr. Michael W. Kahn, an assistant professor of psychiatry at Harvard Medical School who wrote about the project in JAMA, said that if the therapist explained the diagnosis, some patients might feel relieved, knowing their behavior fits a pattern that others also experience.

Dr. Glen O. Gabbard, a psychiatrist and professor at Baylor College of Medicine, said that opening notes to patients might have a chilling effect on doctors.

“A psychiatrist would be less likely to put down anything he is musing about as diagnostic possibilities or write about what he feels the patient is leaving out,” he said.

Mr. Baldwin’s longtime friends know about his harrowing battles with mental illness: The hospitalizations. The manic episodes. The depression. The anxiety so crippling that two years ago, at a Costco parking lot, he couldn’t get out of the car.

As he withdrew into his apartment, pints of ice cream, Zoey, and the telephone became his constant companions. During the worst sieges of anxiety, he would call a few friends three, four times a day.

That is the man they recall, he recounted in his freshly tidied apartment. Its décor is hopeful: a multicolored rug, violet curtains, a jaunty lime-green wall.

And so is Mr. Baldwin. He is trying to lose weight, maybe someday have a new man in his life.

He clicked open another therapy note.

Mr. Baldwin “is continuing to try to push himself to get out more and to be more socially connected even while his emotions tell him to do the opposite,” Mr. O’Neill wrote, adding that his patient is “clearly making good, and even courageous, efforts on a number of fronts.”

Mr. Baldwin, who celebrated his birthday recently with a museum lecture, movie and dinner, flushed with pride.

“I’m going to email this to my friends,” he said.

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Dating Through Social Networks

Dating Through Social Networks

2014-07-04

Are You Channelling The Full Dating Power Of Your Online Profile?

If you’re in the dating game, these days, that involves a little online savvy. It’s no secret that our back-and-forth in the dating world can get tangled up with our online social life. Sometimes it gets a little blurry. Where are we networking and when are we trying to find our next potential dating target? The good news?  It seems like this line is getting so blurred that everything is, well, open season. Gone are the days when your only recourse was having to answer a load of personal questions to create a profile on an online dating site. There are a tonne of places to engage with women and channel your inner Don Juan without the obvious overtones of potential hook ups. But where are people having the most luck? 

We figured the best way to solve that mystery was to ask you guys. Yes, that’s right: AskMen asks men. We’re not ashamed to admit that sometimes we need your help, too. 

How are non-dating social sites benefiting your dating life? *
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We need to know: Are you using any of the following in meet women in a cool, new way? *
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How are you using this site to meet women?

 

Marital Disagreements & Wives

Marital Disagreements & Wives

2014-07-03

New Study: It Matters More For Wives To Calm Down After An Argument Than Husbands

Turns out there’s a lot of truth in “happy wife, happy life” — or least “happy wife, happy marriage,” anyway.

A recent study conducted by researchers at UC Berkeley found that, when it comes to happy marriages, it’s more important that the wife keeps her cool during an argument than the husband.

The study found that, in fact, both husbands and wives were equally capable of keeping their temper during a conflict (which is interesting and refreshing evidence to hear as generalizations are often made about both sexes regarding temper). However, when they looked at the long-term results, “the husbands’ emotional regulation had little or no bearing on long-term marital satisfaction.”

The 80 couples in the study were part of a cohort of 156 heterosexual couples that researchers at UC Berkeley have been tracking since 1989.

The study confirms a long-time stereotype that wives are the “peacemakers” in heterosexual relationships.

The senior author of the study, psychologist Robert Levenson, suggested that the potential reason for this is that when wives offer solutions it generally helps the conflict, whereas when husbands offer solutions, they can often be “criticize[d] for leaping into problem-solving mode too quickly.”

However, a co-author of the study, Claudia Haase made the point that as gender roles have shifted and changed over the years, the dynamics of the middle-aged couples in the sample may not be reflective of young couples today.

Most young people today are progressing toward gender equality in their relationships. Part of achieving this is having both spouses feel comfortable expressing their opinions and not having either one consistently playing the role of peace-maker or decision-maker.

Diffusing conflicts of a sensitive nature with your spouse can be difficult, but we have some advice about how to diffuse an argument, even when you feel certain that you’re right.

One excellent answer came from OilyB:

“If it’s someone I love and the subject of the argument is small enough, I try to restore love and connection; it’s more important than being right sometimes.

If the subject is more important I try to find the emotion/emotional need behind their statement or behavior, vice versa with mine. If the feeling or need is valid we try to find a different strategy for nurturing that need. This incorporates the ability to want to fully listen to and understand what the other person says, even if you really don’t agree . It’s a sign of intelligence when one is capable of discussing an idea one is totally opposed to.

Last resort: acceptance of a difference of opinion or need. Acceptance is a muscle everybody needs to train.”

Sometimes in disagreements with loved ones, how each party feels is more important than the facts or details of the argument. For example, if one person in the relationship thinks the other is cheating on them and it turns out to be untrue, what’s more important is the bigger issue — that there is clearly a problem with trust in that relationship — rather than the fact that one person was wrong about the other cheating on them.

Gender dynamics in couples are definitely changing, seemingly, generally for the better. And keeping an open mind and trying to put oneself in the shoes of the other is advice that both husbands and wives can take to the bank.

 

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