Does Sexual Wellbeing Lead to Better Life And Leadership Skills? This Sextech Company Wants To Find Out

2019-11-26

The connection between sexual well-being and mental and physical health has been recently attracting more interest. Sexual wellness brands -many of which endure constant advertising censoring– advocate to position sexual health and wellness as part of the health conversation, to make it more accessible to all.

A rich body of research confirms that sexual satisfaction affects relationship satisfaction, which is key to earning potential. For example, in one longitudinal Harvard study, the data revealed that fulfilling relationships are the key to happiness, health and longevity. And not only that: Those with the most fulfilling relationships earned an average of $141,000 a year more at their highest earning point.

This study, however, was focused exclusively on male subjects, and it inspired a recent study conducted by sexual wellness company Womanizer (WOW Tech) in partnership with The What Collective, a women-centered organization founded by dot com entrepreneurs Gina Pell and Amy Parker. The former co-founders of Splendora (acq. by JOYUS) recently hosted a gathering called The What Summit at the secretive and exclusive Skywalker Ranch. The survey was completed by over 200 high-earning attending women. 80% of respondents were ages 35-64 and in director, management and C-suite positions.

The preliminary results showed some interesting insights: More than 50% of respondents perceived that having a healthy fulfilling sex and relational life would positively impact all other aspect of their lives, including their careers.

The Deficit in SexEd Addressed By Wellness Brands

When it comes to sexuality only 3% of respondents said they had learned at school or with their families. The majority cited the following sources of sex education: peers and friends (34%), magazines and books (28%), and the Internet (10%). In fact, 77% of women who received some sex education stated that it never mentioned that sex should be pleasurable and 70% say there was no discussion about consent. Additionally, 62% state that they have experienced shame around sex and sexuality.

Global expenditure on wellness products and services is on the rise, highly driven by women, and the women’s empowerment movement has added to the conversation issues such as the orgasm gap between men and women, and the right to body autonomy and pleasure of women. This context creates an opportunity for Sextech and Femtech businesses to create innovative solutions to educate and offer resources in underserved categories for people of all ages. Both industries have been estimated at $30 and $25 billion, respectively.

Stephanie Keating, Head of Marketing of WOW Tech, which comprises Womanizer and We-Vibe, said: “Womanizer partnered with The What Summit to facilitate conversations amongst women about pleasure and all that it brings our lives. For many women, experiencing self-pleasure builds confidence, comfort, and agency – yet 75% of us were not taught that sex should be pleasurable. Traditional sex education has failed us. For too many women, pleasure is associated with shame. That limits us in so many other aspects of our lives. The conversations that Womanizer and our experts are having with women free us to talk to each other about this essential part of our lives.

Personal Fulfillment As A Source Of Confidence And Wellbeing

When asked about the impact of their personal sexual wellness in other areas of life, the majority of women believed that feeling fulfilled positively impacted how they showed up in other areas of their lives. Specifically, 51% stated that this translated into a positive impact on their professional lives. Many respondents pointed to the correlation between fulfillment and “confidence”, “lowered stress”, increased overall “happiness and motivation”, feeling “empowered” and “powerful”, and the positive correlation with overall “well-being”.

Emily Morse, Doctor of Human Sexuality, relationship therapist and author, says “Sexual wellness impacts body image, confidence, … These factors can put a strain on our mental health. If you are not connecting with your partner, it is going to affect your day to day life. Additionally, being able to ask for what you want is a skill that translates into other areas of life.”

Sexologist and relationship expert, Dr. Jessica O’Rielly, PhD, said: “Sexual fulfillment, relationship fulfillment and life fulfillment are all positively correlated. It follows that investing in your relationships and sex life (however you define it) and fulfilling those needs leads to greater self-assurance, improved mood, increased motivation and even greater assertion skills — all of which can benefit your career.”

Educators, researchers, entrepreneurs… The business of sexual wellness is a growing one and the merger of Womanizer and We-Vibe, which is about to become the largest sexual wellness toy manufacturer, approaching $100 million in sales, wants to push forward a healthier narrative around sexuality: “ Our flagship products were created to help women achieve personal sexual fulfillment and their pleasure potential. WOW Tech’s mission is to be the premier provider of sexual health and wellness products — products that enable people all over the world to increase the satisfaction of their personal and sexual well-being,” concludes Keating.

Estrella JaramilloContributor ForbesWomenWomen’s Health Advocate and Entrepreneur.

Am I immoral because I’m attracted to my husband?

2019-09-19

By Shahid Wafa Published: May 15, 2016

During a conversation with a female friend, she let me in on a strange secret. She said,

“Once, my husband doubted my morality,”

I remained silent, mostly out of curiosity. She continued and said,

“It happened when I tried to get intimate with him; not with a stranger but with him, my own husband.”
“What exactly do you mean?” I asked bewildered.
“He hadn’t come home from work and I was missing him. Aroused, I approached him, thinking he’d appreciate that. In return he gave me a stern look and said, what is wrong with you? Why are you behaving so immorally?”

This was expressed with a dejected and forlorn look on her face. Naturally, this would affect any wife.

Surprised by her story, I tried to convince her that Pakistani men were neither this judgmental nor as narrow-minded.

“No that’s not the case. A man may approach his wife whenever he wants, because he is the husband, but when his wife wants to exercise the same right, she is immediately labelled as immoral,” she replied angrily.
“Perhaps, your husband has some sort of psychological knot in his head.”

I responded, in an effort to try and figure out the reason behind his strange behaviour.

“If this sort of mentality is prevalent in all men, then it’s safe to say that the entire male population in our society has psychological issues – not just my husband.” she added.

I was honestly beginning to get a bit impatient and bothered by her generalised accusations. How was she finding it so easy to blame all men for her husband’s fault?

“What do you mean?” I asked out of politeness.
“Just so you should know Mr Shahid, newly wed brides are instructed by elder females in the family to show deliberate ‘self-control’ during intimacy, especially in the early days of marriage. Now isn’t that an example of unfair moral policing? The slightest expression of natural desire towards one’s own husband is enough to declare a woman as morally corrupt. Isn’t that completely absurd?
Women are also human beings and have feelings, just as men do. They also need comfort and pleasure like any other human, regardless of their gender. How can anyone associate this with one’s morality and character? It makes no sense.” She added.

After listening to her, I figured there may be some truth in what she told me. It really couldn’t have been based on imagination.

So, in order to evaluate her accusations and stereotypes, I asked an elderly man whether it should or is considered ‘incorrect’ for a wife to initiate intimacy with her husband.

“How can it be wrong? She has every right to. There really is no objectionable element in such behaviour, but during these 40 years of my marriage, my wife has never done this. Not even once.”

Concluded the elderly man with great pride.

That satisfaction on his face validated my colleague’s heartfelt allegations.

To further probe into this warped mind-set, I discussed the matter with one of my friends. He handed me an old book on morals, traditions and ethics and advised me to read the chapter “Azdwaaaji Zindagi kay Adaab” (Ethics of married life). I didn’t even know such a book existed!